Dear Taylor Swift...

When this rant began in my head, I was surprised at myself.  I was surprised because my original premise was, "Girl you are bringing all women down!"  That surprised me because my college years happened at the beginning of the very politically correct nineties and I had so much crap pushed on me about what a woman should be that I almost became an anti-feminist.  I believed that the "ideal" was pushing women toward forgetting their femininity and abandoning their individual identities.

In fact, my definition of "equal rights" was best summed up by the Golden Girls character, Blanche Devereaux, "Oh honey!  We don't want to be treated the same as men, we want to be treated better!"

Yet ... I found myself still annoyed.



Annoyed by what?  Annoyed by the way you've turned your serial dating escapades into product (your music), but calling them "art".  I suppose that, in this TMI world where it is perfectly acceptable to splash your personal business all over Facebook to your 635 "friends", it might be called art.  Alas, this is another example about how I am truly un-hip.

Upon more contemplation, I realized that my issue was less about feminism and more about what we are teaching girls about growing up to be strong women.  In my opinion, one of the most important attributes a young woman must possess is self respect.  Along with self respect comes a respect of others...  Kind of like that old adage about how you can't love someone else until you love yourself.

It was also funny to me to find that, this independent rant was also topical as Tina Fey and Amy Pohler dissed you at the Golden Globes.  I'm never topical.

I'll get to my point...  While I'm not usually susceptible to tirades about how women have, for more than a century, fought to be respected and given opportunities, I'm going to go there for half a second.  Women have fought for more than a century to be respected and given opportunities.

Now, do I think that your serial dating and then subsequent song writing about those moments that were assumed (by at least one of the parties) to be private is going to bring down all woman kind?  Not all of us.  Those of us above 25 who have already matured are likely not impressed and will not attempt to emulate your behavior.  Those of us who are mature know that, in order to receive respect, we must give respect to others.

However, there are many young women and girls out there who do not know this.  Who, as they develop, may think it's okay to dish about their romantic misadventures and completely forget there is another person who may have a different perspective and, most importantly, feelings.  They will forget that others' feelings are just as important as their own.

And that will be downfall of the future of women.

You may not think you are a role model.  You may not want to be a role model.  For better or for worse, your public life makes you a role model.  It's time to act responsibly in that role.