Today in Queen Bess's Life

Portrait of Elizabeth c1560
Artist Unknown

On this day in 1559, Elizabeth responded to Parliament's request that she marry.  It was the first of Parliament's delegations that she marry.  Her response was measured and finely crafted.  In fact, she suggests that it is God that does not want her to marry and that it has nothing to do with her own desires.  That if God wanted her to marry, he would incline her heart toward a man she should marry.  Ever proper, she ends her speech very politely:

"And here I end, and take your coming unto me in good part, and give unto all eftsoons my hearty thanks, more yet for your zeal and good meaning than for your petition."

The speech can be read in its entirety here. 

Spinster's modern spin:

I know that your codpieces are all in a twirl.  What can I say?  God has not yet provided me with a man that can keep up with me.  Seriously, I speak five languages, am an accomplished writer and horsewoman, escaped execution by my own sister, and became the friggin' Queen of England!  Who do you think can possibly live up to that?

Go home and worry about your own shit, I've got things to do.

Peace,
Queen Lizzilicious

Because I cannot find the date of Elizabeth's response to Parliament's second entreaty to marry in 1566, I will include it here as this speech is the one that receives more attention -- likely for the change in tone and the solid tongue lashing that it is unleashed upon the Members.