Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts

Thursday, October 18, 2012

I'm a Smart Ass Baby...

Sometimes I kill myself -- so you don't have to kill me for being a smart ass.  Get it?  That song by Beck?

Anyhew... RLF is usually the 'victim' of my sarcasm.  I think I was at the top of my game a couple of days ago.

Monday night while I babysat (she had gone to fetch her husband from work since they're down to one car), RLF started texting me just like a mom:

(6:59 PM to 7:05 PM)
RLF:  Everything going good?
RLF:  I just got here
SS: Yep [my hands were full of baby for heaven's sake]
RLF:  Awesome :)
RLF:  If step daughter gets bratty [the kid is 7 going on 22], let me know.  I warned her before I left
SS:  We're doing her homework :)
RLF:  Wow!  That's great!

I know that's nothing outstanding.  I'm trying to set a mood...  The mood is that she is a little worried that her domestically challenged aunt is in charge of her childrens' well being.  However, she is going to make it seem like it would be the kids' (or her) fault if things go awry.  All I was thinking was, "I can't text and cuddle at the same time.  I'm picking cuddling over texting."

(7:21PM)
RLF:  We're running behind but we're headed back home now.....i am so sorry!!!!
SS:  Okay.  The fire trucks will be here soon.

(7:25PM)
RLF:  Lol!

What's with the rapid fire texting when she has no reason to have anything to worry about?  But a four minute delay when I tell her the house is on fire?  Or is it just that it took her that long to stop the hyperventilating before she realized I was joking?

Tuesday afternoon:

RLF:  Do me a favor?
SS:  Feed Mac'n'Cheese to Aaron Rodgers?  Okay.
SS:  What do you need?
RLF:  Lol, will you look at my employer's website and tell me what u think?  FYI its supposed to be attention grabbing for halloween
SS:  Are there pictures of Aaron and Clay wearing nothing but masks?  Because if there aren't, then it's not catchy.

She only puts up with me so she can have my counted cross stitch cats.