My Subconscious is Broken

Or, at the very least, has let me down.

The other night I had a dream about this man:

This is #12 of the Green Bay Packers.  Aaron Rodgers -- Quarterback, Superbowl XLV MVP, NFL 2011 MVP.  He is what I would define as a 'Cougar Snack' for those of us of a certain age.  And not just because he's handsome.  He's also very smart, articulate, and humble.  On top of it -- he's kind to children and animals.  He's the whole package.

In fact, he's on my 'Freebie List' with Mr. Man.  Mr. Man is in no way threatened by this.  He's smart enough to not say, "Well, you wouldn't have a chance."  He also knows that all I would want to do is make #12 Mac'n'Cheese and just watch how many bowls he could eat.  That's not even a euphemism for something kinky.  It's honest to goodness boiling of pasta and covering it with cheese.  Think about how many calories this guy must expend on the football field!  He must be able to pack it away!

My unconventional view of what I would do should I actually meet my "crush" is also fueled by two important factors:

Technology Buzz Kill continued...

The canker sore and the cramps are gone.  Still crabby.

So I decided to call Office Max for shits and giggles.  I was on hold a long long time.  I finally got to speak to the manager of the whole department.  He was very nice, "Looks like we requested that store transfer today.  Hopefully it should be here tomorrow."

Wait.Wait.Wait.

"Hmmm..." I said, "Well, that's unfortunate.  Yesterday I talked with the Sales Associate who sold it to me last Friday.  She told me that the re-order had been placed on Tuesday after they discovered the mistake on Monday."  He was quiet.  What could he say?  I didn't want to make him do the apology-but-I'm-going-to-back-up-my-employee-because-I'm-a-good-manager-dance.  Especially when I was guessing that he was not happy to hear that tidbit -- it always bites you in the ass when you lie to a customer like she did.

I continued, "I realize that's neither here nor there and I am not going to yell at you for that.  I do think it's important that you know what was communicated by one of your employees.  That said, where do we stand now?"  More time on hold.  Him calling places.  Him asking if he could call me back.  Oh, he did offer me the floor model.  He didn't offer a discount.  I didn't ask.  I just said that wouldn't be an option.

He had to call me back while he called the other store because he couldn't see if it had been shipped yet or not.  We just got off the phone.  The person he talked to at the other store couldn't tell if it had been shipped or not because she couldn't look up tracking numbers in the system.

Uhm.  This is now the point where you tell the person from the other store to go get another one (if they have more stock) and send it out herself right this moment.  Like NOW.

I'm not even pissed anymore.  I'm ambivalent about the whole thing.  I fell in love with that laptop.  I looked it up on the Best Buy web site.  Yeah, that was a sign of desperation.  It is $80 more at Best Buy.  They have it in stock in my city.

Pay more and go against everything in me by walking into Best Buy.

Harumph.

Why Is Buying Technology a Buzz Kill?

I have cramps and a canker sore.  I may be crabbier than usual.  I am going to rant.  Get some coffee or a cocktail.

This is a topic that I was going to write about on Friday, but was sidetracked by the annoying friend.  Today brought the topic to the front of my mind again and I must rant.  The topic is buying technology.  It is, in my opinion, a pain in the ass.

Technology is meant to be a tool and it is also meant to entertain.  It should, in this world, bring us all the instant satisfaction that we desire.  Yet obtaining technology seems to be an ever increasing complicated mess that is not for the weak of heart.  Here's what I want when I am buying technology:  I walk in and tell the sales person what I want.  The salesperson leads me to what I want and I am immediately in love.  I buy it, I go home and open it and it works and I am happy.  Is that so hard?

Apparently so.

That's What you Spend on a Mani-Pedi

Today was a very productive day.   More productive than I intended, actually.  This is the first time today that I've really been "still".  And that's how I became more productive than planned.  I had such a momentum going, that I kept seeing little projects that needed tending to and I did them.  Whut?  I know.  Then I started stressing when I looked at the clock and I smacked myself on the forehead, "You are not going out of town tomorrow night.  You can do this tomorrow night!"

THANK you!  Now I can be a slouch again.

Of course, I've not had very many productive weekends of late.  And, since yesterday was a total loss of a day, I suppose I shouldn't feel triumphant about today.  Yesterday I slept a lot.  Not napped, but slept because my body needed it.  Why would my body need so much sleep?  Because I was horrendously hung over.  And what exciting thing could have happened to make me hung over?  A coworker (who used to be my dearest friend, but I've distanced myself from because she's ... a mess) called to bitch about work, her life, and this that and the other.